You see, i don't really feel that anything can upstage the Hoff. So I'll just write some boring stuff about my trip.

I arrived in London on Monday afternoon,about 23 hours after boarding the plane in Perth. There was a malodorous, odious, obnoxious man in the seat in front of me. Let's call him Fucktard (or FT for short). I had spotted him earlier as we boarded and prayed that he would not be sitting near me. (Praying would possibly be more effective had I a deity to deliver the answers.) The FT was a real caricature of the annoying Aussie overseas. I felt that i might be being set up by some comedy TV show and kept expecting someone from The Chaser to pop up or a hidden video camera to be revealed. The FT insisted on sharing his vast experience of travel with anyone who would listen to him. I heard him talking about his taxi to the airport: "I had a Chinese taxi driver...1.3 BILLION people in China, would you believe it...well, I brought up the Faaaaay-lun Gong and Tienamen Square of course and he had no answer to that..." On the plane, he was sitting next to friends Kel and Bec. It was their first trip to Europe and Kel's first time on the plane. A rather receptive audience for FT. The entire Perth-Dubai leg of the flight he stayed awake, with a constant relay of stewards delivering drinks, all the while keeping up a running commentary on whatever in-flight entertainment he happened to be enjoying at the time. Fortunately, he somehow got up-graded to business class for the final leg of the trip (probably because he was too pissed to make it back to economy) so I had some sleep before landing at Heathrow.