Happy Australia Day.

My Australia Day, 2007, began in the Emergency Department. Yes, I was working on Australia Day. The last 3 hours of my 10-hour shift were after midnight. How un-Australian is that? Not as un-Australian as the fact that I'm returning to the same ED in 2 hours' time, undoubtedly to fix up more victims of Australia Day drunken violence, drunken accidents and drunken drunkeness. My favourite Australia Day ED story was from a med school colleague who treated a guy whose mullet was set on fire on the train home from the Skyshow. Now that's Australian.

Also quite Australian (albeit circa 1978) - my neighbours. My new apartment building has a swimming pool on the ground floor (next to the gym, sauna, etc.) and I've been enjoying it on these sweltering summer days, swimming laps, inviting friends around and...enjoying the scenery? That's right, there's a plague of topless sunbathers, and not just the hairy, overweight male type, if you get my drift. One of the pool rules calls for "appropriate attire" but this is open to interpretation, I guess. Most astonishing was one girl this week who had oiled her breasts. She was basting in the 35+ degree heat, glistening nipples pointing at the sun. If my breasts are self-saucing puddings, then hers are certainly fried eggs (not that her nipples were yolk-coloured). Whenever I tell people this story, they always ask, did she have nice breasts? Well, of course, otherwise I would have told her to put on some clothes.